Friday, October 18, 2013

SAFE SEX the "QUICKIE" version

From the pages of Twisted Madness comes Safe Sex, the "Quickie" version

By Ron Chapman
When it comes to safe sex, there is nothing safer than to not do it at all and let me tell you why.
            Before going out to the football field, Jimmy makes sure he has a full clip in his pistol and as soon as that’s done, he quietly sneaks out the door without making a sound then cautiously makes his way to the fence that surrounds the perimeter of the field. Amazingly he avoids all the walkers, undetected. Jimmy keeps both eyes on Olivia as he makes his way to a gate at the end of the field where Olivia is. He takes his eyes off of Olivia just long enough to make sure no walkers were after him. Once Jimmy is satisfied that the coast is clear, his eyes are back on Olivia like glue.
            Except for the pale skin, pieces of rotting flesh falling off of her, a bite mark taken out of her shoulder and her milky colored eyes, Olivia is just how Jimmy remembers her; skinny, round firm ass and big boobs. Even dead Olivia still makes Jimmy’s knees weak and his stomach feels like there are a lot of butterflies in it.
            Olivia is wearing her cheer leading uniform. It may be tattered and torn in places but to Jimmy, Olivia still looks good, walker and all.
            As Jimmy approaches the gate, Olivia suddenly looks over at Jimmy with an empty stare in her milky eyes. She turns and starts to go after him, just like he wanted. Her moans get louder as she opens her decaying mouth wider. The other walkers are alerted to Olivia’s moans of hunger for Jimmy’s flesh where upon they too are now after Jimmy.
            Jimmy hurries up and opens the gate to let out Olivia. He doesn’t wait around for Olivia to walk out after him, instead he runs around to the front of the school to get his truck. On his way back to the truck though, Jimmy encounters a slight problem. There are four walkers standing between him and his truck. Jimmy unsheathes he machete and with ninja like speed, he decapitates three of the four walkers. Before the fourth walker can put his dead hands on Jimmy, Jimmy jumps into his truck and backs over the walker on his way back around to the football field. Jimmy doesn’t bother to turn the truck around so he continues to drive it in reverse. As soon as Jimmy turns the corner of the school he sees Olivia in his rear view mirror. She is slowly walking towards the front of the school where Jimmy just came from. Olivia is being followed all the other walkers that were on the football field with her just a few minutes ago.
            Jimmy stops the truck a few feet from Olivia. He grabs a burlap sack and some rope from his back pack then gets out of his truck and runs around to the back of his truck just as Olivia reaches the truck. Jimmy runs around behind Olivia and throws the burlap sack around her head and quickly ties some rope around it so that the hood doesn’t come off. Jimmy then binds her arms to her side so that she cannot move them.
            Jimmy looks at the horde of walkers that are following Olivia. They are now about fifty feet away from tearing Jimmy apart.
            “Boy what I wouldn’t give to have Casper here now.” Jimmy tells himself as he watches the horde of walkers.
            Jimmy picks Olivia up and over his shoulders then throws her into the back of his truck bed. The rest of the walkers rush the truck just as Jimmy gets into it and closes the door. Jimmy starts the truck and speeds away. He runs over a few of the walkers as he speeds away. Olivia’s body bounces around the bed of the truck.
            It’s not long before Jimmy has left the infested town and is now on his way back home.  
            Soon Jimmy is pulling into his driveway and continues to drive straight back to the entrance of the bomb shelter. Jimmy gets out of the truck and looks around to make sure there aren’t any unwanted guests.
            Jimmy disappears into the shelter for a few minutes. Fifteen minutes later Jimmy exits the shelter.
            Jimmy opens the tail gate of the truck and carefully reaches in to pull Olivia out by her feet. She is still moaning and groaning. As Jimmy gets Olivia to her feet, she tries to take a bite out of Jimmy through the burlap sack. The sound of teeth clamping down can be heard from under the sack.
            Carefully standing behind Olivia, Jimmy quickly and carefully escorts Olivia down into the family bomb shelter.
            Once inside, there are no lights. The shelter is illuminated by dozens of candles and incents to cover up the smell of rotting flesh.
            Jimmy walks Olivia to the only bedroom in the bomb shelter. Olivia resists Jimmy directions while trying to bite Jimmy through the sack over her head as she is being led into the bedroom.
            Once inside the candle lit bedroom, Jimmy turns Olivia around so her back is facing the bed then gently pushes her back onto the bed. Before Olivia can work her way off the bed Jimmy loosely ties off one of her hands to the head board. He then quickly does the same to Olivia’s other hand. After her hands are tied Jimmy spreads Olivia’s flailing legs and does the same to her legs. Olivia is now spread eagle and tied to each corner of the bed. Jimmy steps back to look at Olivia. He could have never done this before the walkers took over. Jimmy looks at Olivia with a satisfying look on his face.
            Olivia’s moans echo throughout the bomb shelter. Her head thrashes from side to side.
            Jimmy leaves the bedroom long enough to find a pair of scissors. Jimmy starts to cut away at Olivia’s dirty cheer leading uniform until all that’s left are her dirty panties and bra. The smell coming from Olivia is unbearable but he keeps cutting. Soon her panties and bra are also off, leaving her totally naked except for the burlap sack over her head which Jimmy decides to leave on. Jimmy looks longingly at Olivia’s crotch and boobs.
            When he is done, Jimmy stands back to admires that which lies before him. Her skin might look different. She might even smell like a dying animal but to Jimmy, the walker tied to his bed is the same Olivia he knew long ago before the United States ruined everything.
            What happens next will change Jimmy for the rest of his lonely life. He is about to do something that no other person dare do.
            Jimmy wastes no time in taking off his clothes then slowly climbs on top of the decaying Olivia, being careful not to get close to her hooded face. He sticks his hard, virgin dick into Olivia’s rotten pussy. As Jimmy moves his hips back and forth. His trembling hands move along Olivia’s discolored, rotting body until he comes to her lifeless breasts. He takes them into his hands and gently caresses them. His long awaited dreams have finally come true. He is losing his virginity to his high school dream girl, even if she is dead.  
            Hours later Jimmy wakes up sitting in an arm chair, totally naked, looking up at the shelter’s ceiling. At first Jimmy doesn’t feel anything but then there is a pulling and a yanking sensation between his legs. Jimmy quickly looks down to see Olivia between his legs. She must have gotten loose some time ago and now she is having her way with Jimmy like he did with her. Olivia looks up at Jimmy with a mouth full of cock. She is chewing away at what’s left of Jimmy’s penis.
            Jimmy screams at the tops of his lungs but no one can hear him even if there was someone around outside, after all the bomb shelter is sound proof and now that he is inside the shelter, only he can let anyone in.
            Unknown to Jimmy there is a knock on the shelter doors. If only Jimmy was able to hear the knock and answer the door, he would be greeted with the biggest surprise of his life. Jimmy’s father wasn’t the only one who had a bomb shelter put into the ground.
            Casper is also with the people knocking on the shelter doors. Casper is missing a few patches of fur and a few bite marks from the walkers earlier. Casper is barking hysterically at the shelter doors.
            When no one answers, the real, living, breathing, warm bodied Olivia walks away with her father and Casper, unknown that Jimmy is just a few feet away screaming at the top of his lungs for help.

Saturday, October 12, 2013


From the pages of TWISTED MADNESS comes SAFE SEX.


By Ron Chapman

When it comes to safe sex, there is nothing safer than to not do it at all and let me tell you why.
A boy by the name of Jimmy takes his father’s old beat up pickup truck into town with his dog, Casper, a German shepherd sitting in the passenger seat. Casper looks out his window with his tongue hanging out. Jimmy looks over at Casper and gives him a few strokes on his head.
It’s so quiet, no birds chirping or radio, just Jimmy his dog and the sound of his father’s pickup truck rolling down a country road. Jimmy drives by an occasional off to the side of the road, abandoned and left for looters.
As Jimmy gets closer to town, He begins to hear the town’s church bell. Casper’s ears perk up. The sound of the church bell rings throughout the country side.
“Who the fuck? They’re going to attract the walkers.” Jimmy tells himself. Jimmy steps on the gas and speeds towards the church. As the truck races down the road, a few walkers step out of the woods and walk towards where the sound of the bell is coming from. Casper barks hysterically at the walkers as they speed by them.
Jimmy speeds through the town, right to the church. The town’s main street is beginning to fill up with hordes of walkers of all shapes, sizes, age and degrees of decay. Jimmy takes out a few along the way with his father’s truck. Casper continues to bark at the walkers. When Jimmy reaches the church, he just about rams through the front door of the church. Before Jimmy exits the truck he grabs a small hand gun. Before going into the church, he takes a quick look around and notices hordes of walkers coming out from everywhere like cock roaches. Some of them are crawling without legs while others are limping along. Casper leaps out of the passenger window and takes after the walkers, luring them away from Jimmy. It was as if Casper knew what to do. Jimmy watches as his only friend leaps into a cluster of walkers.
Casper’s barks can be heard along with the sound of flesh being ripped away. The walkers are piling on top of Casper. The walkers moan and groan as they claw and rip at Casper. Jimmy continues to watch as Casper disappears under the pile of walkers. Jimmy can still hear Casper’s barking which turns into yelping. That is when Jimmy turns and quickly but cautiously runs into the church to quiet the church bells.
When Jimmy reaches the bells, he is met with a surprise. The priest that used to give a sermon every Sunday morning turned into a walker just like the rest of the town. Unfortunately the priest had fallen off a ledge and somehow got the ropes that were used to ring the bell every Sunday wrapped around his neck and was now moving up and down every time the bells rang. When the hanging priest sees Jimmy walk into the bell room, he starts to claw at Jimmy, trying to get at him.
Jimmy points his hand gun at the priest and fires, blowing what’s left of his brains all over the place. The sound of the gun shot rings up through the bell tower. Jimmy drops the gun and grabs his hears as he drops to his knees. “Oh shit. That was fucking stupid.”
Hours Later Jimmy has found his way to the roof top of the town’s only grocery / hardware store. From here Jimmy is able to get a good view of the whole town. Jimmy is however without his faithful companion, Casper. Jimmy is kneeling down so that he cannot be spotted by any of the walkers passing by.
The town’s main street looks like a battle zone. There are vehicles over turned and burned out. Most all of the store and area businesses have been looted. Some of them are even burned down to the ground.
Even though the town’s people are rotted and decaying, Jimmy can still make out who they are, for example, he sees deputy sheriff Mason scuffing along, aimlessly down the middle of the road. Martin the barber is seen just standing in front of his barber shop, not doing a thing. He is just looking off into space and moaning. Willie the town drunk is on his belly, eating what looks like the remains of a rat. Willie’s legs are missing. As Jimmy looks down the other end of the street he sees the biggest walker he has ever seen since they started to inhabit the earth. The walker looks to be four hundred pounds of rotting flesh. Jimmy just so happens to know this walker’s name too, Donna. She was the school’s cafeteria cook. She wasn’t as fat back then. Donna must have gorged herself on as many of the living as she could find before the living became scarce.
“You fat fuck. I never did like your cooking.” Jimmy whispers to himself.
As Jimmy continues to watch and take in the undeadly sights, he reaches down, picks up a can of chipotle BBQ style bake beans and with a hand can opener, he carefully opens them, taking great care as to not alert the walkers. Once the can is open, Jimmy wastes no time with a spoon, he pours some of the can into his mouth.
After a few mouth full’s bake beans Jimmy puts the can down and as he does, he hears Casper barking as he runs down the street full of walkers. Casper is covered in blood.
The walkers slowly turn to face the barking dog. Casper takes out a few of the walkers as he runs down Main Street.
Jimmy sits up and watches but then notices a road block coming at Casper a little ways down the street in the form of a four hundred pound walker named Donna. Jimmy knows that Casper can take care of himself but not if him and Donna meet. Donna will rip Jimmy’s best friend apart and he’s not about to let that happen.
Jimmy reaches down and picks up a homemade spud gun that he learned how to make in science class. Jimmy puts a potato into the barrel of the spud gun and takes aim at the four hundred pound walker called Donna. He fires but misses. The potato hits a walker in the head that was standing next to Donna. The potato turns to mashed potatoes with a little walker brains mixed in as it hits the nearby walker. The walker collapses into a motionless pile on the ground. Casper is getting closer to Donna with each passing second. Jimmy quickly picks up another potato and loads it into his spud gun then fires. This time the potato gets a piece of Donna, tarring off her rotting nose as it whizzes by her but it’s not enough to take the overweight walker down.
“Fuck!” Jimmy tells himself.



Jimmy's spud gun




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